I Have a Problem

They say the first step in resolving a problem is admitting it exists in the first place. So let me confess: I have a problem. I think I’m addicted to flirting.

For the last several days, I’ve been flirting like my life depends on it, and now, it’s pretty apparent to me that I have a flirting addiction or something. I mean, I flirted with the matronly mail lady (erk!) and I even tried to hit on that young and sexy-sounding girl who called around lunch time to sell me a subscription to a local newspaper…

It’s been suggested by some of the readers here that this might be the work of Attitude. No surprises there, I guess. I sought her out to confront her, but all that came out of my mouth were some of the corniest pick-up lines that have ever crossed male lips. She was laughing so hard she couldn’t breathe. I eventually walked away, pretty confident that this whole flirting thing is yet another of her tricks.

I hope it wears off soon. Sure, I like the collection of phone numbers I’ve been getting, but I have to be in the office on Thursday and I dread what’s going to happen if it’s not gone by then.

That, and I’m terrified of running into Brooke until that curse is gone. I’m still reliving that kiss, and I don’t quite understand (or like!) the effect it’s had on me.

–Jaycee

2 thoughts on “I Have a Problem

  1. Yep. Admitting you have a problem is Step 1. The thing is, when the problem is a faerie curse, what is Step 2? Considering how your attempt to confront Attitude went it seems you’ve got a real dilemma on your hands. Maybe we the readers could try petitioning Attitude on your behalf?

    Attitude dear, if you’re reading this, please please PLEASE show Jaycee some mercy! Yes, what you did for him has helped make his life quite a bit better, but if he can’t stop it when he needs to the whole thing is just gonna wind up in a huge, colossal train wreck. Think about it for a minute. You know Jaycee. You know from personal experience how these things tend to wind up for him. It starts out benefiting him, but then he can’t stop because the spell won’t let him and it winds up ruining the best things he’s got going for him. He can’t help going overboard when he’s under a magical compulsion. He’s already caught some minor flack over this, but if he can’t stopper the flirting by Thursday he could wind up losing his job and getting slapped with sexual harassment law suits. Do you really want to do that to him? If you won’t remove the spell, maybe you could consider modifying it a little so that he at least isn’t compelled to flirt with anybody he’s already flirted with prior?

  2. Let’s presume that this is one of Attitude’s pranks. The problem isn’t just the flirting. The problem is that Jaycee isn’t learning to control the fine details. He’s letting the curse run itself instead of taking the helm. He’s obviously obligated to flirt, but I seriously doubt he’s obligated to spout misogynistic one-liners. He needs to flirt differently. When he learns to do it on his own, the curse will be moot, and will likely end without him even noticing.

    So Jaycee, invite a few friends over and practice. Get comfortable with the idea of flirting. Figure out how to do it without losing control. Learn to trust yourself the way you thought you did back at the coffee shop. You don’t need to “hit on” someone to flirt with them. Chivalry is one of the most blatantly flirtatious acts a person can commit, and few people will complain about having a door held for them. There’s rarely anything wrong with offering a complement (though avoid underhanded ones). Even an apology can be flirtatious if done properly, and you won’t end up offending anyone either, but that level of control takes practice.

    Oh, and don’t be afraid to flirt with everyone. I don’t just mean women you’re interested in dating. Heck, I don’t just mean women. Learn to act like an extrovert. Eventually being outgoing will feel natural. And the curse (presuming that’s what it is) will only accelerate the process.

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